First Confessional

Tuesday, 11 November 2008

I am a 24 yr old single mother to a beautiful little girl.Since late February early March, I have been suffering from Anxiety. I remember the night it started. I was driving home at night from college classes. My drive home exceded 30 miles. For some reason I developed an acute fear of being in a car accident and dying. I prayed and prayed that God let me get home to my little girl who was 5 months at the time. I remember being so scared that my stomach was in knots and I nearly pulled over because I thought I was going to be sick. The problem got worse so I went to my MD in tears.He prescribed me Paxil which did help after a few days suprisingly but for some reason I am terrible about remembering to take my medicines which I later found out , while doing a research paper on anxiety disorder, that difficulty remembering is linked to Anxiety Disorders. I sometimes go through periods where the problem is not that bad, but there are days like I have had the past few weeks when I nearly go into "shut down" mode just driving across town ( which is about 12 miles for the town I live in). I know that these fears are not logical. I mean, I know everyone is going to die someday and that there's no stopping that. I mainly fear dying of a horrible death. ( I think being a paramedic has exposed me to the negative side of death.) I try to be very devoted to God. As a matter of fact the only thing that gets me through driving long distances is just talking to God as if he were sitting right next to me. In my beleif we should not fear death but see death as a joyous event because one is going on to be with God. I do look forward to being with God in Heaven but sometimes the fear that has been instilled in me over powers my love for God ( which I feel very wrong for saying this). I know that part of it has to do with being a mother. I fear of what will happen with my daughter if I should pass especially since she does not have a father. I have learned that a routine exercise regiment helps and it did but now that I am in nursing school , I'm lucky tohave time to sleep. *L* I would like to be able to sit down for psychotherapy but I feel like this is a matter that should involve a therapist with the same religious beliefs as I have and around here that is very very rare, not to mention it's extremely expensive around here and I do not have insurance to cover it. I joined this community in hopes to find someone that I can share my experiences with Anxiety and hope to help someone else as well as possibly receive help from those that have recovered from it.

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rippelk2 said:

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There is usually always something close to you in almost every town where you can find some sort of lowered cost or of free expense to see someone. Finding someone with the same religious beliefs maybe hard, however, whoever you see will not be voicing their opinions about god, they will be listening to you, I'm pretty sure they could get fired for voicing their differing opinions strongly about a subject like that.

Try setting a daily alarm on your cell phone for your medications. That is what I do. It really helps.

Welcome to the site! :)
 
November 11, 2008
Votes: +0

rippelk2 said:

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There is usually always something close to you in almost every town where you can find some sort of lowered cost or of free expense to see someone. Finding someone with the same religious beliefs maybe hard, however, whoever you see will not be voicing their opinions about god, they will be listening to you, I'm pretty sure they could get fired for voicing their differing opinions strongly about a subject like that.

Try setting a daily alarm on your cell phone for your medications. That is what I do. It really helps.

Welcome to the site! :)
 
November 11, 2008
Votes: +0

rippelk2 said:

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p.s. my mother died when I was 13 months old, and I am fine. I am surrounded by love everyday, and just wish I didn't have to deal with this damn anxiety...
 
November 11, 2008
Votes: +0

rippelk2 said:

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p.s. my mother died when I was 13 months old, and I am fine. I am surrounded by love everyday, and just wish I didn't have to deal with this damn anxiety...
 
November 11, 2008
Votes: +0

lamy12 said:

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Hi and welcome to PS. This site has been very helpful to me. I understand completely what you are going through. Since I had my daughter almost four years ago (along with other issues too)...I have been having intense health anxiety. I worry about dying and leaving my daughter or something horrible happening to her. Since coming on this site, I have learned alot and started to internalize some concepts that have helped me. Yes they are common sense...but I had to really accept them.
a) I have no control(except safety things and good life choices) over my death or anything happening to my daughter b) I and not the end all to my daughter's well being...as much as I want to believe that I am. That is a tough one. But as rippelk pointed out...her mom died and she is okay.

Keep posting and feel free to PM me anytime. We know what you are going through and you aren't alone. hugs, lamy
 
November 12, 2008
Votes: +0

lamy12 said:

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Hi and welcome to PS. This site has been very helpful to me. I understand completely what you are going through. Since I had my daughter almost four years ago (along with other issues too)...I have been having intense health anxiety. I worry about dying and leaving my daughter or something horrible happening to her. Since coming on this site, I have learned alot and started to internalize some concepts that have helped me. Yes they are common sense...but I had to really accept them.
a) I have no control(except safety things and good life choices) over my death or anything happening to my daughter b) I and not the end all to my daughter's well being...as much as I want to believe that I am. That is a tough one. But as rippelk pointed out...her mom died and she is okay.

Keep posting and feel free to PM me anytime. We know what you are going through and you aren't alone. hugs, lamy
 
November 12, 2008
Votes: +0

cherie said:

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Hi. Could you answer the following questions for me? I'm so sorry that you are struggling with this right now.
Please take a look at this survey and post questions for me in hopes that members will respond.

1. When and under what circumstances did you experience your first panic attack?

2.When did you first use the emergency room?

3. How many times have you used the emergency room for panic attacks?

4. Was the staff helpful to you?

5. Was the doctor helpful? Or not? Why or why not?

6. Was the emergency room expensive? Did this make you angry?

7. Did the doctor suggests that you see a doctor or psychiatrist, counselor, etc.?

8. Or did he/she just give you pills?

9. Did you see your personal physician later? Was she/he helpful? Did they suggest that you see a psychologist/psychiatrist?

10. Has your counselor/psychiatrist, psychologist been helpful? In what ways?

11. Have you ever heard of breathing retraining or other biofeedback methods?

12. Are you open to alternative methods instead of just medication? Why or why not?

13. Who told you about them? Or how did you find out about breathing retraining or other methods to help with panic attacks?

14. Do you think that it would have helped your emergency room experience if there had been staff members trained in biofeedback/breathing techniques to help you through the experience and to process afterwards what was happening to you? To educate you about panic attacks?

15. Do you think this type of intervention would be worthwhile to others who have a panic attack and use the emergency room?

16. How many attacks did you experience before finally seeking out the help of a psychologist or family doctor?

17. Are you still suffering from symptoms?

18. Were you diagnosed with depression after you had a panic attack? Before you had a panic attack?

19. How long did it take after your initial panic attack before you were diagnosed with panic disorder or depression by a physician, psychologist or psychiatrist?

20. How are you dealing with panic now? Medicine, yoga, CBT, breathing methods, etc.?
null
 
November 15, 2008
Votes: +0

cherie said:

0
...
Hi. Could you answer the following questions for me? I'm so sorry that you are struggling with this right now.
Please take a look at this survey and post questions for me in hopes that members will respond.

1. When and under what circumstances did you experience your first panic attack?

2.When did you first use the emergency room?

3. How many times have you used the emergency room for panic attacks?

4. Was the staff helpful to you?

5. Was the doctor helpful? Or not? Why or why not?

6. Was the emergency room expensive? Did this make you angry?

7. Did the doctor suggests that you see a doctor or psychiatrist, counselor, etc.?

8. Or did he/she just give you pills?

9. Did you see your personal physician later? Was she/he helpful? Did they suggest that you see a psychologist/psychiatrist?

10. Has your counselor/psychiatrist, psychologist been helpful? In what ways?

11. Have you ever heard of breathing retraining or other biofeedback methods?

12. Are you open to alternative methods instead of just medication? Why or why not?

13. Who told you about them? Or how did you find out about breathing retraining or other methods to help with panic attacks?

14. Do you think that it would have helped your emergency room experience if there had been staff members trained in biofeedback/breathing techniques to help you through the experience and to process afterwards what was happening to you? To educate you about panic attacks?

15. Do you think this type of intervention would be worthwhile to others who have a panic attack and use the emergency room?

16. How many attacks did you experience before finally seeking out the help of a psychologist or family doctor?

17. Are you still suffering from symptoms?

18. Were you diagnosed with depression after you had a panic attack? Before you had a panic attack?

19. How long did it take after your initial panic attack before you were diagnosed with panic disorder or depression by a physician, psychologist or psychiatrist?

20. How are you dealing with panic now? Medicine, yoga, CBT, breathing methods, etc.?
null
 
November 15, 2008
Votes: +0

jillie88 said:

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I'm a God-talker too when I get anixous.... It helps better than anything else I've tried. I like this verse a lot too it helps me so I thought I'd share
"The Lord is my light and my salvation- whom shall I fear The Lord is my strength of what shall I be afrad?" Pslams 27:1
 
November 17, 2008
Votes: +0

jillie88 said:

0
...
I'm a God-talker too when I get anixous.... It helps better than anything else I've tried. I like this verse a lot too it helps me so I thought I'd share
"The Lord is my light and my salvation- whom shall I fear The Lord is my strength of what shall I be afrad?" Pslams 27:1
 
November 17, 2008
Votes: +0

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