Well its been a while since ive written anything on here. When i first started on this website it was like a godsend. It made me feel so comforted to know i wasnt alone. I still feel this way. All the notes from others either happy or said made me feel like i can get threw this and that i wasnt crazy i was just sick and it wasnt my fault i wasnt a weirdo, it was just a disabilty i had to deal with. Ive become ok with that. Thank you all. Now an update on me. I am on 17.5 lexapro and was on .5 klons a day when i went to a really bad anxiety place. I was on both these doses for a bout a year. Now ive been weaning still on lexapro but i had actually made it down to no klons for four days! I am so proud, i took a crumb of .25 yesterday, but im ok with that. Just baby steps. Just to know im getting there and i have crawled out of the anxiety and depression. Im writing to let everyone reading this know its possible. I was in the worst of dyer straights, i didnt want to die but i did because of how crippled i felt. People it gets better. I am its such a happier place. I love to rise in the morning, see my daughter smiling at me! FOr the longest no matter what i did i couldnt stop crying couldnt eat, couldnt leave the house. But there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I just wanted you all to know. I will keep u posted on my weaning. I myself will prob need more help along the way as i continue my journey. But the point is im here and i enjoy life! and every now and then the struggle comes back and i will need this site and other people and meds, but thats ok because you have know it will get better, that reminder keeps you going. I will think of you all and hope that when you are in that dark place you can imagine the light and pull yourself up.