FIOJAEGOIAEOGIJAEOIFJA that's my angry I just poured my heart out in my blog and somehow the back button got clicked and I lost everything. Dammit. Okay in short because I'm not typing that out again:
1. I'm having a panic attack and it sucks sucks sucks & building a tolerance to my xanax so I bascially am taking it only to avoid withdrawals, but I'm addicted to it. And I only have one left until about 8 more hours from now and that makes me feel uncomforable. I should of filled it yesterday. I hate being alone during one of these. My husband works a lot :(
2. Stopped seeing my therapist for now. Had a very hard session and it messed me up mentally and physically for over a week and had nightmares every night. I'm sure I will go back within a few weeks though.
3. Still doing volunteer work at the YMCA. It's hard on me with my anxiety that's for sure. Plus it doesn't help that I hate the feeling of being 'stranded' somewhere. My husband drops me off and picks me back up in like 3-4 hours. I won't drive though, so that's my choice and option.
4. Nathan is doing great! He turned 3 months old yesterday. He's getting so big. He's always laughing, babbling, and smiling now. It's the best thing to see. When you wake up all tired because you only slept 2 hours and go get him because he woke up crying but when he sees your face he smiles. Just wonderful.
This WAS a lot more heart felt and more things that are going on in my life but too annoyed to type it again. Eh, it felt good just to type it out even if no one reads it anyway. So yeah, here's my Nathan post. I took a video of him and daddy 'talking' to each other haha :)
P.S. Anxiety GO AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Take care everyone, and lots of hugs from the both of us! I'm going to try to nap this panic attack away.