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OMG! I'm Getting Worse With No Apparent Solution
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TOPIC: OMG! I'm Getting Worse With No Apparent Solution

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#24255
Imafoodgroup (User)
Watching Survivor
Posts: 13
graphgraph
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OMG! I'm Getting Worse With No Apparent Solution 5 Years, 5 Months ago  
After many, many years of suffering with all this
c--p, I was hospitalized and diagnosed in 1997. Through therapy and medications I was getting better. Slowly, very slowly, I was expanding the tiny safe zone I had created for myself. My anxiety attacks continued but not as severe. My panic attacks seemed to be diminishing as well.

In 2007 it became necessary to move my aging mother in with me. I still did well and the situation actually was a good thing. I was required to go out more and to new places so she could see her doctors and other appointments. Then she fell, broke her femur and I had an entirely new set of circumstances to deal with. The worst being, I could not leave her alone at all for over a year, so my world was cut down to zero. All I was able to do was run to the only safe store I had for food and meds when she was asleep.

Consequently, I have become house bound again and even though I can still go out while she sleeps, the agoraphobia has become worse. Just the thought of leaving the house sends me into the panic/anxiety mode and the intense sweating begins.

This is so stressful. I hate living like this and the longer it goes on the more emotionally and physically paralized I become. This is a lonely way to exist. It certainly is not LIVING. Even if I could find someone to help, I've slipped back so far I cold not go out of the house anyway. I am sure if I did not have mother with me anymore I would find a way to get my food brought in so I would NEVER have to leave the house.

Guess I am not very happy right now. Sorry to dump on whoever reads this but I needed to get this out and I SERIOUSLY need to connect with the outside world, even if it is only on line.
 
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#24259
tsuki (Admin)
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Posts: 927
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Re:OMG! I'm Getting Worse With No Apparent Solution 5 Years, 5 Months ago  
Welcome, I'm sorry to hear you're experiencing such difficult situations. I also experienced agoraphobia for a few years. It would help if you had someone safe to help you with a few of your errands so as to ease some of that anxiety of going outside.

May I ask . . . are you seeing a therapist and on meds? This was my way out. It was not an easy task, but I am outside of my home and driving thanks to it. I also had built a support system of family who could help me . . . hubby, little sister and daughter who were my safe people and the only ones who knew.

Please do not let anxiety isolate you from the outside. Continue your outside errands. Take walks around the block, sit on the porch for some fresh air. Even watching the traffic pass helps to make you feel a part of the outside world. Find your support network, even if just one person. You've already done well by coming here to share with people who truly understand what you are going through.

Please continue to write. When you're ready, start blogging so you can receive advice and input from the kind people on this forum.

I hope Mom is doing well. Sorry to hear of her fall. I just had my Mom-in-law here with us for 3 weeks. She had suffered a series of falls over the years and has had hip replacement surgery. I'll keep you both in my prayers. Please let us know how you're doing . . . hugs
 
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Last Edit: 2012/06/21 23:41 By
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