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Suffering from Extreme Depression
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TOPIC: Suffering from Extreme Depression

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#24458
hopelessdreamer (User)
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Suffering from Extreme Depression 5 Years, 3 Months ago  
Hi! I'm 19 year old and since I was a small kid I already experience a low self-esteem. I'm not a very good dancer, my classmate laughs at me. People always see me as a shy person who doesn't talk to anyone expect some close friends of mine. Because of this, I'm easily bullied by other people. What makes me even more depressed is they call me "ugly". My appearance is just plain looking.

So as I enter my first year college, I already plan my future that after graduate I can find a job outside the country to help my family. But my dreams were crashed because of my Social Anxiety Disorder and I lock my self in my room when my father is around, he works as a seaman. I can't face him and I don't know how to explain to him which will makes him mad and angry at me. I was encourage to go to a small college school but my Social Anxiety Disorder is holding me back.

Months later, I went outside for just once because I'm eager to see my friend. I thought if I see the outside world, my Social Anxiety Disorder will disappear however I experience again those people who judge me even though they don't know me. I felt that I wasn't treat well.

Again I promise myself not to go outside! During my time on my room, I felt insecure and I tried looking for friends online but they view me as "poser" and one said, "Kill yourself!"

Right now I'm seeking help by talking this to other people who has a sense of understanding...
 
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Last Edit: 2012/08/22 16:03 By
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#24460
Cybervato (User)
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Re:Suffering from Extreme Depression 5 Years, 3 Months ago  
People can be cruel. especially those who don't understand what you are going through or have issues they themselves don't want to face. I would hope that you can find someone to talk to in person about what you are going through, such as a Doctor with an empathetic ear and a treatment plan for those with your condition.
 
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#24461
tsuki (Admin)
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Re:Suffering from Extreme Depression 5 Years, 3 Months ago  
Welcome to PanicSurvivor. I'm sorry to read that you're going through a bad time. I also had been diagnosed with social anxiety which helped to keep me home-bound with agoraphobia. Many here have gone through the same and truly sympathize with your situation. Since you mentioned your Dad, I'm wondering if your mother is aware of your anxiety. Please find strength to discuss it with them so you can seek adequate treatment.

Cybervato is correct in advising that you seek help from a mental health professional. Anxiety does not go away by itself. With specialized therapy and a bit of work, I am able to overcome a huge part of my social dysfunction. It still takes some effort, but I can now live my life normally.

He is also right to point out the fact that those who bully suffer from their own inadequacies. Don't allow fools to make you feel less of yourself. Please continue your normal activities outside of your house. Do not allow your anxiety to keep you in isolation. It can quickly develop into agoraphobia and needless suffering.

I'm glad you found our site. Continue reading and keep writing. It helps to release pent up feelings. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
 
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#24462
hopelessdreamer (User)
Watching Survivor
Posts: 2
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Re:Suffering from Extreme Depression 5 Years, 3 Months ago  
Cybervato wrote:
People can be cruel. especially those who don't understand what you are going through or have issues they themselves don't want to face. I would hope that you can find someone to talk to in person about what you are going through, such as a Doctor with an empathetic ear and a treatment plan for those with your condition.
Thanks for taking your time to read this. ^^ I deeply appreciated it. As much as I want to go to a Doctor. I don't think my family can afford to pay since we're saving money for our own good... But your reply really gives me much comfort. I was a bit worried what if no one bothers to answer this...

tsuki wrote:
Welcome to PanicSurvivor. I'm sorry to read that you're going through a bad time. I also had been diagnosed with social anxiety which helped to keep me home-bound with agoraphobia. Many here have gone through the same and truly sympathize with your situation. Since you mentioned your Dad, I'm wondering if your mother is aware of your anxiety. Please find strength to discuss it with them so you can seek adequate treatment.

Cybervato is correct in advising that you seek help from a mental health professional. Anxiety does not go away by itself. With specialized therapy and a bit of work, I am able to overcome a huge part of my social dysfunction. It still takes some effort, but I can now live my life normally.

He is also right to point out the fact that those who bully suffer from their own inadequacies. Don't allow fools to make you feel less of yourself. Please continue your normal activities outside of your house. Do not allow your anxiety to keep you in isolation. It can quickly develop into agoraphobia and needless suffering.

I'm glad you found our site. Continue reading and keep writing. It helps to release pent up feelings. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

I think my mother have already known my situation since my school adviser and her are discussing about me. What I mean to say is that, whenever there's a problem involving me like having a fight with my classmates. She gets called by the teachers.

Like I said with my reply to Cybervato, sadly my family can't afford it. Right now, I seem to be contented with my life by enjoying my time with my 2 pet dogs and cats. My Aunt who's single, living us, is always with me since I was born. She's the one takes good care of me.

I think you and Cybervato are right about that! In my very own opinion there are people will bring you down to make themselves feel a lot better. In my case since I can't fight back and looks very weak is always losing. But then I live a normal life with no problems at all except for the fact my Social Anxiety Disorder is a huge hindrance for me.
Thank goodness I found this site which really helps me a lot! I also like to thank you for your reply and I felt really happy and overjoy. ^_^
 
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Last Edit: 2012/08/23 17:29 By
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