Tuesday, 25 August 2009 |
Hello everyone! I will start by introducing myself. Im 21 years old from the Philippines. Im a 4th year Engineering Student and living a happy life with my parents and siblings for 21 years not until July 27, 2009. This time it change mylife. This is my story.
I had a flu on July 23, 2009, it was the time when the A(H1N1) flu virus is at present. But our community is free from it so i don't give so much attention to myself. My fever had run-off on july 25, 2009. I was busy playing computer game when suddenly i notice that i had a rushes in my hands. i run directly to my mother and ask here about it, she told me that it was nothing, but my sister in-law was their at that time and she told me that it maybe a dengue fever. When i heard that word my body starts to trembling and butterflies in my stomach, I was so nervous. i keep on thingking that it maybe a dendue. The day after, i went to school with the same thoughts bothering my mind and my body is still shaking as if their are currents flowing throught it. i am still nervous that it maybe a dengue because the rushes in my skin is still their.
On july 27 morning i dicided to have a laboratory examination on my blood to find out if i really had a dengue. The good news is i don't have it, but still my mind is bothered and the trembling in my body wont stop. I go to sleep about 10:30pm when suddenly i woke up and had my first panic attack. i felt the world is crushing down on me. i am so nervous. i force my self to sleep hoping that maybe tomorrow it will gone. July 28, i woke up for the first time in my life having fears which i dont know about, i lost my interest, i lost my life as if i will be insane. i have nerves all over my body. i cry begging for help. i dont know my self anymore. i dont know what to do. i hug my brother tightly and beg him to help me. i am so scared for that moment that thingking that i will be insane. i,ve suffered the shakes and trembling for 5 days. But the anxoius thoughts are still in my mind up to this time. I'm still findiing myself. I am still nervous from time to time but manage to go to school. i get my strength to people i love, reading stories which i can realate and praying to God.
Being anxoius is a mind setting, i just keep on thingking positive thoughts and be inspired to little things so the negative will ruh-off easily. I hope this would help, i got this from a movie Kung Fu Panda. it say's "Yesterday is a History, Tomorrow is a Mystery and today is a gift that's why it is called present". We shoud not think to much from the past and a what would the future maybe. Just take oneday at a time.
I hope that my story would somehow help you. We can do this. The good news is i am ok. You will be ok, as my father would tell me, "It wont kill you and harm you". My father suffered stroke for 4 times. And still he is fine. We can be fine too.
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Last Updated ( Tuesday, 01 September 2009 )
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