Personally, things are going well for myself. 

I am volunteering, and deriving a tremendous amount of joy from time spent with kids.  My boys are doing quite well.  I couldn't be more proud of them.  Here are t he things that are getting me down....

Week 24 of my hubby's deployment.  Still going smoothly.  Did a webcam chat yesterday with him - we all just make silly faces at eachother.  He was supposed to find out today when he gets his R&R.  I got an email this morning that he would be out of the office for a few days...I don't know where he goes.  Then there is all of this stuff on the news about 5 soldiers killed today.  And I start to think about the knock on the door that  might be coming.  What would I do?  Then I was afraid to leave my older son at home while I took the younger to scouts...what if they tried to deliver the notification to him while I was gone.   I shook it off.  Went to scouts and left  him playing XBOX.  No knocks on the door.

My father's cancer surgery went well last week.  He finds out the pathology report this Wednesday.  I worry about him and my mom.  They are such a team, so interdependant with eachother.  They have been together since they were 15!  I wish I was closer to them to help.

My grandfather is in the hospital with congestive heart failure.  My poor mom is so torn, between taking care of her husband or her father.  Her two brothers live closer, so they have been picking up all of the slack with Grandpa, while Mom takes care of Dad.  He has been hospitalized every few months for the past 3 years.  Things look bad for a few days, then he gets better and  heads home.  But not this time.  I talked to him on the phone today, he sounded terrible - defeated.  My grandparents are stubborn and ant to live on their own.  Any attempt for nurses to visit, or discussion of a nursing home are quickly shot down.  My mom and her brothers are (this is what my sister and I think) scared of making their parents mad, so they go with what they want.  It is difficult for my sister and me - she is 6 hours away, driving, and I am 6 hours away by plane.  I want to get in there and square them away, but I wouldn't be there for the upkeep.

So all of this is weighing on me... 

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thesirenwailz said:

	... it sounds like you're going through alot. I hope you can take some time for yourself, to relax and let go for a bit.
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March 17, 2008
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