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Monday, 03 January 2005 |
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Posted by: paula222uk on Monday, January 03, 2005
On a winter’s night in December 1989 after a very emotional time, I suffered from a panic attack. All I could do was to lay with my boyfriend until it subsides. I felt my life was ending and the dread I felt was unbelievable! I carried on suffering until I got pregnant, maybe hormones have something to do with it? (coz they seemed to vanish overnight!) Can’t be pregnant forever though, can you? *sigh*
Over the years I've suffered on and off but went months or a year without a full blown panic attack, anxiety was always pretty high though. Then in July 2004 after drinking too much the night before I had a full blown attack, and again a few months later.
March 2004 I got poorly with a virus that affected my head and sinuses (nothing that I’d experienced before ) For a whole week I kept going into panic attacks , I really did feel I was going totally nuts and the 'white van' would be 'coming for me very soon ' ! I read up sooooo much on anxiety depression and panic attacks and to keep myself 'distracted' I created my own website.
From May 2004 to July 2004 I had a course of Hypnosis which I found helped a lot and I studied 'self hypnosis' on the net. I was so determined that it wouldn't control my life, that it wouldn't keep me stuck in the house, that it wouldn't make me live in fear. I will try anything now to make my life more bearable , I don't feel that I am totally cured ,but 99% of the time , I CAN control them by doing something. The more in control you feel , the more confidence you get to go out in the world , knowing you have the tools (in your head) to overcome it .
The power of the mind is absolutely amazing! Never give up, life isn't meant to be easy; it's an adventure and a challenge! I believe you are pre disposed genetically to anxiety and panic attacks, I believe in time, with knowledge, support, therapy and will power, you will feel different and you will SURVIVE!
Best wishes
Paula Milton
Keynes United Kingdom
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