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My life has changed for the better. Everything is turning around. My beloved of 15 years has been caught cheating once again. I have been shit on for the last time by him. He has moved out of my house. Left with almost nothing as everything is mine. Expect for the computer. I miss the computer but I won’t miss the extra bill. He had become little more then a roommate. We slept back to back every night. Towards the end he just stopped coming home. He had stopped loving me and stopped paying all attention to me. I was having panic attacks and anxiety every day. I felt that without him I was nothing. I didn’t know who I was outside the shadow of him. He has cheated on me in the past. I think that now, looking back he may have been cheating all along. I have finally done what I should have done years prior. I was too scared. I didn’t want to be alone. In my house all alone. He has made me feel unimportant for so long. I felt in the way and out of place in my own house. Staying home while he went about his life in the other direction. Pretending I was happy. I was miserable and kept myself that way almost on purpose. To scared to live my life the way I wanted to afraid to be myself. I got strong. Looking, searching on the computer and cell phone for any sign he was messing around. Wanting to catch him (if that makes sense). Then I found the jack pot. He was in fact being unfaithful. Texts to other girls and dirty pictures on the cell phone that I was paying for. So I got strong I told him he needed to move out of the house I felt he never wanted to be a part of anyways. I was done. I was truly done.
And who knew right around the corner was what I had been looking for had been needing for years. Someone to make me feel important and worth something. Someone to share my whole self with and not hold back. Someone to look at me and see me the way I deserve to be seen. I have missed out on so much of my life and my happiness. Now it’s time for me. I WILL do what I want when I want to. I will leave my underwear on the floor if I want or dishes in the sink. I am my own person. I am not someone else’s “other half” I am finally whole.
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My life has changed for the better. Everything is turning around. My beloved of 15 years has been caught cheating once again. I have been shit on for the last time by him. He has moved out of my house. Left with almost nothing as everything is mine. Expect for the computer. I miss the computer but I won’t miss the extra bill. He had become little more then a roommate. We slept back to back every night. Towards the end he just stopped coming home. He had stopped loving me and stopped paying all attention to me. I was having panic attacks and anxiety every day. I felt that without him I was nothing. I didn’t know who I was outside the shadow of him. He has cheated on me in the past. I think that now, looking back he may have been cheating all along. I have finally done what I should have done years prior. I was too scared. I didn’t want to be alone. In my house all alone. He has made me feel unimportant for so long. I felt in the way and out of place in my own house. Staying home while he went about his life in the other direction. Pretending I was happy. I was miserable and kept myself that way almost on purpose. To scared to live my life the way I wanted to afraid to be myself. I got strong. Looking, searching on the computer and cell phone for any sign he was messing around. Wanting to catch him (if that makes sense). Then I found the jack pot. He was in fact being unfaithful. Texts to other girls and dirty pictures on the cell phone that I was paying for. So I got strong I told him he needed to move out of the house I felt he never wanted to be a part of anyways. I was done. I was truly done.
And who knew right around the corner was what I had been looking for had been needing for years. Someone to make me feel important and worth something. Someone to share my whole self with and not hold back. Someone to look at me and see me the way I deserve to be seen. I have missed out on so much of my life and my happiness. Now it’s time for me. I WILL do what I want when I want to. I will leave my underwear on the floor if I want or dishes in the sink. I am my own person. I am not someone else’s “other half” I am finally whole.
- | Add as favourites (29) | - | Quote this article on your site | - | Views: 1431 | - | Print | - | E-mail
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