I feel like I have been waiting for ever for the weather to get nice. But now that it is finally starting to get warmer, I feel like I’m not ready for it.

When it’s cold and snowy outside everyone is in the house bundled up on the couch watching TV. But in the spring and summer everyone is outside.

My new boyfriend has been talking about camping for 4 months. They have a cabin or something that they go to every year. This year I am invited to join them. I feel like I should want to go places and be outside but I just want to be in my house. I like to be home. I WANT to be home. People are welcome to come over but I don’t want to go out. I feel nervous about camping. I have never been there and I think it is about an hour from my house. I have already come up with a million excuses in my head why I won’t be able to go.

I want to want to do stuff. But I soon will be without my excuse of the cold weather. It’s strange that I couldn’t wait for it to be nice out and now it scares me.

It seems I am never happy, always wanting something else. I never just feel satisfied.